I miss this.

Lots.

-Ellie

Barney - the boy that also lived

Everything about her was perfect, from the clear nail varnish to golden hair clips. Even in dreams or memories, where everything was imagined perfectly, she reigned over all ideas of real beauty in every step she took down the isle.

Multiple times he didn’t let her know he was doing the same secret glance she was, turning away in shame that he wasn‘t up there waiting for her to stand before the priest.

She was so beautiful that when she turned to face everyone, he had to cough to breathe again.

Entranced, he noted that beside Fleur and her veela relatives she gave off an aura that made him feel like someone who wasn’t Harry Potter or Barney. He was.. himself.

Hours passed until he dared himself to push through the crowd and get himself a drink.

“You know,” said Luna, startling him. She was still in that obnoxiously yellow dress. “Even if you’re Barney, you are still entitled to dance.”

“Who? Oh, yeah, yeah..” There was no way to deny actually having a choice, one of many, to offer his hand as a dance partner.. Even if this one seemed harder than destroying the horcruxes.

“You look more bored than at Umbridge’s lectures, honest..”

They laughed and despite his interest in speaking more with Luna, he watched Ginny dance with someone that looked like Krum.

“Excuse me, Luna.. I think I will go ahead and try to have a bit of fun. Thanks.” He gave her a little hug, as if to reassure himself that he could do it. Now to try and not make anyone suspicious.. Exhaling, he finished his drink and, throwing it in the nearby bin, fixed his abnormally fine and manageable hair.

Slightly pushing Krum, he caught Ginny’s eye and gave her a hopeful look.

“Hey, er.. Relative..” he pretended to joke as if she was, “Can we- er, would you like to um.. Dance? You know, as uh.. Like old times?” he finally finished and watched her face for any mark of an adequate response. He held out his hand and gave a lopsided grin that even a Barney’d never achieve unless he was a Harry as well.

[You may finish it, Kelsey, I know you wanted to write about dance-partner thing ^__^]

"I am Harry, just Harry.."

a small child spoke. "Everyone thinks I am special, all those people in the Leaky Cauldron.. But I don't know anything about magic at all. How can they expect great things? I'm famous and I can't even remember what I'm famous for.."

A loud, echoing voice overlapped the child's.

"Don' you worry, Harry. You'll learn fast enough. Everyone starts at the beginning in Hogwarts. You'll be just fine. Just be yourself. I know it's hard - you've been singled out an' that's always hard. But yeh'll have a great time at Hogwarts - I did. Still do, 'smatter of fact..."

Harry was at the Burrow now, finally gone from the Dursleys. "Hagrid was right," he said to himself. Hedwig was no longer there to listen. She was the only animal to truly understand him, it seemed. Now she was gone.. just like that, in the same green light as his parents...

Suddenly he noticed something white in the corner of his eye. Moments later he lit his wand just to give himself another hearbreak.

Just a stupid piece of parchment...

His wand still lit, he stepped outside his little room and rubbed his eyes in fear of crying. He needed to put away all the fears and pains if he was to do what Dumbledore asked him to. How was it that after Sirius's death he still felt the same powerful pain when someone died?

Wasn't it supposed to help him be defended against all deaths that were to come?

Yes, it was true that he was never going to hear the brilliant-white owl peck on his window with a letter from Sirius or Dumbledore, nor would he see Moody's eye whirling in and out at him skeptically. Or smile at George for the memories of getting a toilet seat or Marauder's map.. Everything was so different, yet he had to square with it, he had to keep it as a reminder of how important his task was.

He made his way downstairs and sat on the lowest stair. His mind was now on the Horcruxes: The goblet, the snake, the ring...

How could he be helped without knowing about them? If anyone still could trust him after Skeeter's articles, then they cared too much to aid him in something dangerous and unknown.

A shadow passed in front of him and his heart beat like a wild man on a drum. Mrs. Weasley?! Oh, not now...

"Harry," spoke the shadow, a calm soothing voice.

"Hey Ginny," came out words he didn't plan. How he wanted to tell her everything, take her away and escape this madness with her..

Cursing his reckless stroll downstairs, he watched her sit down next to him and tensed up, as if questions and dreaded reflection on their break up were coming.

"It's not your fault," she spoke and he could no longer keep his eyes away from hers. In them was love and his own longing to let her know everything he couldn't. "It's not.."

For the first time in maybe years he felt such relief that previous thoughts scattered and left him. As she looked away, his lips mouthed a "thank you" and he closed them before he'd dare kiss her.

Sorry, Ginny.

[ooc:]

As much as I hate to say it... I have to quit.

I am the least active in this roleplay (unfortunately) and right now, I have so much going on in my life. I have fifteen roleplays that I have to keep up with and it's starting to get really demanding.

I am so sorry, to leave you all, because I wanted so badly to be a part of this, but alas I prove myself unworthy. I am so so so terribly sorry.

Love always and best wishes,
- Sav